Me and my cousin/guy friend recently mended fences. We joke around quite a bit, but there’s still one thing he still likes to joke about a little bit (but not a lot) and that is jokes related to ugly women. This topic still bothers me a little bit/touches a nerve, especially since I was bullied in high school…
Well, there is a difference between joking around and picking on people. Have you ever seen “The Office” (a tv show)? The main character thinks he is the funniest guy in the world, but most people think he is a jerk because his “jokes” are so unpleasant!
I don’t know the details of this situation, so here’s some general advice. Your cousin may be a jerk. Or he may be a nice guy who doesn’t realize he may have issues with women. I have a friend who is the same. He is not the suavest guy on Earth, so he often “jokes” about how hot women look. He never does it about men. I think he does this to make himself feel better that they won’t give him attention. Whatever the case, it is OK for you to tell him the jokes get old.
Overreacting would be screaming and yelling and never talking to your cousin again. It is OK to tell him to tone it down. If you feel weird about saying this, you could joke about it. For example, “did you learn all your jokes from an unhappily married, middle-aged man? Or the guy who couldn’t get a hot prom date? Because your jokes are always about ugly women. You’re brave to tell them in front of me, because I was an ugly woman once!”
If he doesn’t get the hint, tell him straight. Good luck.
You are 40 years old. You shouldnt over react. They’re jokes after all.
Yeah, your being silly, this is just who he is and your not in high school anymore.